The Daily Mustard

Ben brought a giant cookie for his brother's birthday to the Patrol Leaders Council tonight. As Mitch was leaving, I noticed he'd been eating green icing and I said something about intending to "kick ol' Green Teeth right in the knee." Nobody knew what I was referring to, including the adults standing around.

So here -- purely in the interests of cultural literacy, mind you -- is Charlie Daniels' great hit from my college days, "Uneasy Rider."

I shoot the Hippopotamus
With bullets made of platinum,
Because if I use leaden ones
His hide is sure to flatten 'em.

– Hillaire Belloc, The Bad Child's Book of Beasts