December 31st, 2008

aha

It's Hogmanay!

. . . and also our anniversary.

Thirty-five years ago today, collinsmom and I were married in a little church outside West Lafayette. As weddings go, it was a disaster. A major snowstorm the night before prevented most of the guests (including my parents) from attending. Various other small glitches and goofs adorned the ceremony itself. Even what we did right (she made her own dress and cake, and did it well) simply added to the stress of the whole event.

Meanwhile, lots of our contemporaries, and many others I have witnessed since, have managed to pull off the super-expensive, glitter-mega-social event of the year, only to have their relationship hit the rocks within a few months or years. For all our rocky start, we are still together.

What makes some relationships last, and others fail? (Besides sheer dumb luck or lack of imagination?) My observations follow. Collapse )