The Daily Mustard

Your Linguistic Profile:

60% General American English

10% Dixie

10% Midwestern

10% Upper Midwestern

10% Yankee

Of course, some of us can change our dialects at will; or almost -- I suppose a native speaker of one of the regional dialects would catch me out. Still and all, I tell people that I grew up in a household where Standard American English was spoken, and that when I use regionalisms, I am being "folksy" by choice. Those who have struggled and struggled with Standard grammar and pronunciation think I am putting on airs. But then, they never met my mother and father: they had their quirks, but that's the way they actually spoke in day-to-day discourse. (I didn't actually learn the rules of grammar and punctuation until I was working in the ISU Writing Center as a grad student -- I just spoke that way, wrote that way, and guessed right on tests by assuming that Mother was always right. I was "culturally advantaged," as they say.)

Well, I bought a bunch of stained glass tonight for the first angel window: a night scene with the Angel of the Nativity. Background will be dark blue, gray, light blue (in layers). Star and accents on angel's clothing (belt, shoes) will be white. Angel's hair is charcoal, face champagne. Robe is streaky wine color, with cuffs and insets the color of a raspberry smoothie.

I've begun to teach the kids how to cut glass. I get the pattern copied tomorrow, so Sunday we start to cut out the pattern and cut the actual window glass. At the same time, I'm going to have to teach more kids how to cut glass, since last Sunday's attendance was awful.

I figure collinsmom, that_guy_zach, and I will attack the finished piece with soldering irons when it's ready. Then we take it to the pro, who helps me put on the border and bracing. And we'll be ready for installation!

Then we can start the two Resurrection witnesses' windows. I hope soon to be able to post pix in this LJ -- certainly by the time we get the first window finished!

CHAPTER III

THE CONVERSION OF ENGLAND

Noticing some fair-haired children in the slave market one morning, Pope Gregory, the memorable Pope, said (in Latin), "What are those?" and on being told that they were Angels, made the memorable joke -- "Non Angli, sed Angeli" (not Angels, but Anglicans") and commanded one of his Saints called St. Augustine to go and convert the rest.

The conversion of England was thus effected by the landing of St. Augustine in Thanet and other places, which resulted in the country being overrun by a Wave of Saints. Among these were St. Ive, St. Pancra, the great St. Bernard (originator of the clerical collar), St. Bee, St. Ebb, St. Neot (who invented whisky), St. Kit and St. Kin, and the Venomous Bead (author of The Rosary).

England was now divided into seven kingdoms and so ready were the English to become C. of E. that on one memorable occasion a whole Kingdom was easily converted by a sparrow.

WAVE OF EGG-KINGS

Soon after this event Egg-Kings were found on the thrones of all these kingdoms, such as Eggberd, Eggbreth, Eggfroth, etc. None of them, however, succeeded in becoming memorable -- except in so far as it is difficult to forget such names as Eggbirth, Eggbred, Eggbeard, Eggfilth, etc. Nor is it even remembered by what kind of Eggdeath they perished.

-- W.C. Sellar & R.J. Yeatman, 1066 and all that, Copyright, 1931, by E.P. Dutton & Co, Inc.