aefenglommung (aefenglommung) wrote,

The pile of boxes is steadily growing

Packing to move is always a weary and depressing affair; however, packing to retire is even worse. Always up to this point, I've looked at all the stuff I own and thought about how I might enjoy it or use it in the next stage of my career. Now, I'm thinking what I'll do with it for the rest of my life.

It's kind of like making your will and setting your affairs in order. There's a deep sadness to it. I'm sure once I actually retire, I'll find life opening out again -- at least, I hope I will -- but right now, there is a funereal quality to preparing to move.

I have just the two children, and they don't particularly need any of my stuff. I have just the two grandchildren, and while I'm saving a lot of this for them, I'm not sure they'd miss it if I just burnt most of it. But then, I'm not ready to go sit in a single room and stare at the TV, either.

So, I'm believing in life after retirement the way I believe in life after death. I don't know what it'll quite be like, but I believe -- even without evidence -- that it will be good and fulfilling. Meanwhile, I don't want to just sit down and wait for Jesus to do something. I have this picture of us living in the house I have imagined for so long, surrounded by not only the things I treasure, but the people I treasure. And time to enjoy everything to the full.

Lord, may it be so.
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