For me, I said the dominant thing in my life right now is a kind of sorrow. I see my country falling apart. The likely nominees of both major parties who must address this are both appallingly unsuitable. I see my Church -- the UMC -- tearing itself apart. General Conference may not jump off the cliff, but it may not accomplish anything to stop the disintegration of our denomination, either. I am at an oddly fragile time in my own life, as I try to navigate my sixties and make progress toward my goals. I'm not even sure what those goals should be right now. I worry about my daughter and her family finding a permanent home. I worry about what will happen to my son, long-term.
So, I said to the group that the most important things in my life right now are Peace and Hope. They're what I'm intensely longing for. I acknowledge, of course, that Jesus is my Peace and my Hope, and if all other security in life is taken from me, I will cling to him and ride out the storm to whatever end it finally takes me. But, if my prayers could be answered, I would like to live in a free country like the one I have known all my life, and belong to a Church that still believes in the things I vowed to teach and maintain forty years ago, and feel more confident about my own direction right now, and not have to worry about my children.
Every day, I put these things in God's hands. Only then can I turn my attention away, toward those things that must be done this day: to serve him as single-mindedly as I can. But at the end of the day, every day, there they all still are. And it must all be done again. This is just what I'm living with, until further notice.